New Release Movie Reviews

Movie Reviews:

Get Smart
Rated: PG-13
Run Time:
53% on the Tomatometer
54 on Metacritic
Trailers: Bad

This is a run of the mill, instantly forgettable, movie for many reasons. First off, it's decent. Not great enough to quote endlessly and actively encourage others to watch but not so horrendous you warn passerbys to stear clear (I.E Zohan and Guru...). Steve Carell and Anne Hathaway have some chemistry but it's hard earned. The plot is decent, the action is better then most other comedies and there are some laugh out loud moments. Steve Carell is at his best when he has no self awareness like the lovable Michael Scott and part of that shines through in this performance. Good date movie, good for a matinee or a good way to kill a couple hours in a theater waiting until Dark Knight comes out. But not a future cult classic like 40 Year Old Virgin. But a boat load better then Evan Almighty.





The Incredible Hulk
Rated: PG-13
Run time: 114 min
65 % on the Tomatometer
61 on Metacritic
Trailers: Good

I was a little hesitant with this "new" Hulk movie. The Ang Lee version was horrible. Bad acting, bad plot, bad CGI. Just bad. But I perked up when I heard Edward Norton (Fight Club, The Italian Job, American History X) would be playing Bruce Banner and co-writing the script. Edward Norton is a comic book fan so I knew the story would at least follow the origins (except updated much like in Iron Man) in the comics. It skip over the traditional origin part where Bruce is blasted with Gamma Radiation and goes straight into plot with Bruce hiding from the US Army. The story moves rapidly but still feels slow at times. Before you know it the Hulk is having is showdown with Abomination. But it has some superb acting in Mr. Norton and Liv Tyler isn't as annoying as she usually is (. . . Armageddon). I love that Marvel is starting to establish its own Marvel Movie Universe continuity which was a major reason for the rebooting of the Hulk franchise. Its the little connections like Tony Stark in the Hulk, Nick Fury in Iron Man that makes the Marvel Universe feel more alive. And all of this is leading up to the Avengers movie due out in 2011.


Kung Fu Panda
Rated: PG
Run Time: 88 Minutes
87% on the Tomatometer
73 on Metacritic
Trailers: Bad

This movie focuses on an out of place Panda voice by Jack Black trying to find his place in the world. Its a pretty cut and dry story and typical of what is to be expected with most kids movies. It's funny, don't get me wrong, but predictable. I walked in expecting an average animated movie but walked out watching a decent Kung Fu movie. This is one that will keep the little ones entertained without boring the parents. There were some scary images for the really little ones but I seen a fair amount of 4 year olds in the audience. All in all not bad and a good way to spend a couple hours in a cool movie theater.

Iron Man
Rated: PG 13
Run Time: 126 Minutes
93% on the Tomatometer
79 on Metacritic
Trailers: Good

Best movie of the year. Until Dark Knight comes out. This movie mixes great action, good acting and great special FX. Its one that I have seen a half dozen times in the theaters and it just gets better. Robert Downey Jr. is back on top and is here to stay, I hope. I loved his character in Zodiac and hoped I would get to see more of him in the upcoming months. Between Iron Man and Tropic Thunder its going to be a good year for Downey. And finally we get a decent female lead in a comic book movie. I actually found Gwenyth Paltrow bearable and downright likeable. Perfect for Pepper Potts. It has a couple nods to the comics and a couple great easter eggs (Captain Americas shield makes a cameo)

Indiana Jones
Rated: PG 13
Run Time: 123 Minutes
77% on the Tomatometer
65 on Metacritic
Trailers: Good

I wanted to like this movie but I just couldn't. Indy is a character we all know but really don't love. You can make a Star Wars movie any time and people will watch it because Star Wars is a religion, same with Star Trek. But not Indiana Jones. No one was wondering what Indy was up to. Sadly its like this movie was done more for money then anything which doesn't make any sense because Spielberg, Ford and Lucas doesn't need the money. It was ok at best but toward the bottom of the summer movie list for me.

Favorites

I decided that the easiest way to keep track of what I felt about Concerts or Movies or Cd's or Video Games or anything like that was to keep a blog of my reviews and opinions. So first i'll start with a list of my favorites and ill start the reviews later. Caution though, some posts will contain profanity.

Favorite Movies and why (in no particular order):

Moulin Rouge - I never really liked musicals. Grease never did anything for me. Footloose was okay but only because of a wicked awesome punch dance scene. Never saw Chicago. In fact you name it, musical wise, I have not seen it. But Moulin Rouge is different. It has some brilliant cinematography, superb acting and an engaging story. The Director, Baz Luhrman, has done some interesting pieces in the past (Romeo + Juliet, Strictly Ballroom) and this one takes it to another level. The coloring of the movie is truly engaging and gets you emotionally involved with its rich saturation of Red and Gold. And lets not forget an AMAZING performance by Obi Wan-Kenobi himself, Ewan Mcgregor. I think he could have saved the Star Wars prequels if he had sang. Nicole Kidman did OK at best but I founder her character tepid and boring. The last scene with Satine and Christian after the Finale of "Spectacular, Spectacular" is about as moving as any performance caught on film.
Stars : ****
If you liked this, watch: RENT, Trainspotting

Gladiator - Epic. I think that sums up this tale from the brilliant Director Ridley Scott. If you didn't like this movie and your a dude then you need to hand in your man card and go rent The Notebook. The plot wasn't quite historically accurate but where is the fun in that? This movie is anchored by performances from two of this centuries greatest actors, Joaquin Phoenix and Russell Crowe. The scene where Russell Crowe collapses at the feet of his wife and son tugs on your heart strings and the scene where he takes out the first Gladiator and throws the swords into the crowds gets your adrenaline pumping. Rarely can a film do both.
Stars: ****
If you liked this, watch: 300, American Gangster

Unleashed - Far too often Jet Li is forced into roles that do nothing to further his acting ability. I mean he either plays an assassin, an enforcer or a combination of the two. In this movie he actually gets to display is acting chops and does so in fine form. The story has a good plot, good acting (Bob Hoskins of Who Framed Roger Rabbit fame co-stars, as does Morgan Freeman) but phenomenal fight scenes. I think there is an awkwardly developing love story between Danny and the ugly red-headed chick but it never pans out, thankfully.
Stars: ***1/2
If you like this, watch: The Protector, The One

There are loads of other movies on my favorites list but it takes too much effort to write about all of them . Some others are The Departed, The Bourne series, There Will Be Blood (i even have an "I Drink Your Milkshake t-shirt) Hitch, Iron Man, X III, Judd Apatow comedies etc. . .


Favorite TV Shows

This list is a lot easier to write because it is pretty self explanatory. My favorite shows are:

The Simpsons
House
The Office
M*A*S*H
John Doe (cancelled after two seasons)
Oz
Futurama
Ren & Stimpy
COPs

Favorite Musicians and songs:

Garth Brooks (live version of "Shameless")
Johnny Cash (Folsom Prison Blues live from Folsom Prison, Cocaine Blues)
Simple Plan (Untitled)
Underoath (A Boy Brushed Red Living in Black and White)
Story of The Year (Sidewalks, Wake up)
Styx (Dear John, Lady, Mr. Roboto)
Journey (Faithfully, Open Arms, Don't Stop Believing)
The Used (Taste Of Ink, Buried Myself Alive)
Blake Shelton (Ol' Red, Some Beach, Baby)
Brad Paisley (Is It Raining at Your House, Somebody Knows You Now, With you, Without You)


This next one shall be a little more extensive, like my favorite movies. I love stand up comedy. So i feel this one will take some explaining because each of my favorites have completely different styles.

Favorite Stand-Up Comedians

Emo Phillips - He is brilliant in a completely stupid sort of way. He has a similar non-sequiturs style to that of Eddie Izzard and Stephen Wright but his presentation is downright goofy. Prepare yourself for some odd takes on life.

Quote "Nothing wakes me up like that first pot of boiling coffee. . . Oh, i've tried other enemas"


Eddie Izzard - Watching Eddie Izzard perform is like flipping through TV stations a million miles an hour. He jumps from one subject to the next with no linkage between. Be prepared for stories told about Sean Connery playing Noah and having a speed boat, cats drilling behind your chair, and a whole mess of other topics. Oh and just for fun he is a British transvestite.

Quote "I wanna live 'til I die; no more, no less."


Louis C.K. - He is an American born stand-up with no unusual quirks about his appearance or speaking patterns. But he is honest. Whether calling his 4-year old a douche bag or admitting to jerking off to pictures of his wife's friend, Louis C.K. will make you question your moral compass.

Quote "I'd like to name my kid a whole phrase, you know, something like 'Ladies and Gentlemen'. That'll be a cool name for a kid. "This is my son, Ladies and Gentlemen"... Then when he gets out of hand I get to go "Ladies and Gentlemen, please!"

Mike Birbiglia - Since when has being pathetic been funnier? According to Mike himself he makes awkward situations more awkward. And it couldn't be better. He has stories that he tells every week in his immensely popular blog "My Secret Public Journal" which he also narrates on the Bob and Tom Show.

Quote "I have a habit of making awkward situations even more awkward. I was moving a new bed into my apartment, and a women opened the door for me with her key. And she said, "I'm not worried because I know a rapist wouldn't have a bed like that." Now what I should have said was nothing... but what I did say was "You'd be surprised."

Mitch Hedberg - The new king of the one liners, Mitch Hedberg is an amazing performer with unabashed stage fright. Mitch took to the stage often wearing sunglasses and staring at the floor the entire time but he had an almost unequaled connection to his fans. Mitch passed away March 29, 2005.

Quote "I was gonna get a candy bar; the button I was supposed to push was "HH", so I went to the side, I found the "H" button, I pushed it twice. Fuckin'...potato chips came out man, 'cause they had a "HH" button, for Christ's sakes! You need to let me know. I'm not familiar with the concept of "HH". I did not learn my AA-BB-CC's. God god dammit dammit."

Once again there are too many to list but other notables are Stephen Wright, Bill Engvall, Christopher Titus, Stephen Lynch, etc.


This is the end of post numero uno. But this project is far from complete. Soon I will start my reviews for new movies, cd's, video games and a whole bunch of other things.